Wednesday, December 29, 2010

Hormones?

     I wonder sometimes if men can go through hormone changes like women are said to during pregnancy. Some would call this a hormonal rant, but I don't feel like ranting and raving about nothing important. This actually strikes me as something to be genuinely curious about.

    I love my husband dearly. I do. Really. I think though that he has had more episodes of moodiness than I have on a bad case of PMS. I am not about to call him out on everything that he's been moody over. Firstly due to the fact that, well... this is a big change for him just as much as it is for me. Secondly, because there are just things that I feel need to be left alone so I can sit back and laugh at them when I'm feeling a little put back and out of place. A lot of you don't know my husband at all, and have never met the man. (Not to be biased but he IS a great man) He is the type of person that can go to hell and back and still be the same person he was when he left. He has a strong sense of just who he is, where he is, and what he wants. I love that the most about him. He loves me, and isn't afraid to give me a swift kick when I need it. lol

   He was the first to find out about our daughter, and that is how it should be. I couldn't tell if he was excited or just as scared as I was. In fact, I think I still debate that to this moment. I know he's happy about the baby, but I wish I could tell you that I knew that he was either excited, scared, or even a little bit of both. This may sound like an excuse, but even through 2 years of being together and 1 of which being married... I still have trouble sometimes picking up on his emotional ques. (Not that he drops emotional cues) Usually when he's happy... it is the same as him being sad as far as facial expressions go, so trying to read is as good as staring at a brick wall. It is something he's been getting better at over the time period, but I still don't get why he's like that. It is something I've come to expect and even come to terms with myself, as I am more of one to put how I feel out there weather or not someone wants to know...

    Maybe this is not something I need to be blogging about... but asking about it will just bring about another long conversation on how he's working on it. I know he's working on it... and I can see it... I think it's worse with MY hormones out of whack and his becoming out of whack for him too... He was upset at pizza. yup. pizza. The culprit is still in my fridge, as it is a kind I don't eat. I knew he meant well when I asked him to put it in for me, but he did not see my pizza box on the pan... I wasn't angry, not even sad or upset... and when I was laughing it off and putting MINE in, he got upset about it... I guess something as silly as pizza can get me thinking about something completely irrelevant. lol. Hooray for hormones and the joys of being married!

Guess it's time for me to get on with my "New Years Resolution: Not being prego anymore".

   

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